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The Frequent Slaying of Louie

Everybody loves a good story (Especially one where somebody dies in the end).

Whilst brushing my teeth this morning I chuckled at my contact lens case (Slow morning). It turns out that the good people at Advanced Medical Optics happened across a fact I have known for quite some time: Left equals Awesome (Despite being shafted by the "right hand of God" thing).

And so I set about doing a little research (Slow evening). I came across the usual (probably false) statistics and compiled them for your easy perusal.

10 percent of all Americans are left handed. 10%! (There are more 100% Irish people in America than Lefties). What's more, left handed college educated men stand to earn an eye-popping 21% (doubtful) more in wages than their boring-pawed counterpart. This almost comes close to making up for the 9 years lefties sacrifice of their lives (66 vs 75 yr lifespan) (That was the death scene).

Interestingly, 2/3 of the world's population is right eye-dominant, which refers to the eye your brain favors. This makes the remaining, roughly 1/3 (some are neither) left eye dominant.

The chances of being both left eye and hand dominant, then, is .3%.

You guessed it: I'm one of the .3%.

Interesting play.

Too bad my left eye is 55% worse than my right one (dag).

My Boston contact case has both the L and the R marked on top. They don't discriminate.

Assuming the events are mutually exclusive, wouldn't the probability of left-handed and left eye dominant be P(LH & LE) = P(LH)*P(LE) = 3.3%? My probability is a bit shaky these days.

Oh, I'm one of those wierdos who is right-handed but left eye dominant. No wonder my hand-eye coordination sucks.

Fact.

(Must have forgotten a 0!)

I'm willing to blame pretty much anything on my disability.

"What's that Sammy? You don't think I graded your lab practical correctly? Turns out I'm left eye and hand dominant. And you lose. Better luck next time, pal!"

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About me

  • I'm ndNips
  • From Minneapolis, Minnesota, United States
  • The Irish Gopher is an Advanced Ph.D Candidate at the University of Minnesota where he spends most of his time getting scalded while dressed up as a bunny. In his free time, he religiously stalks the University of Notre Dame football team as well as Steven P Jobs. Also, he is really bad at generating nicknames for people.
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