An Explanation?
Earlier in the year, an anonymous entity decided to plaster placards about the city that contained a state border-inspired sprite along with two words: "Minnesota Nice." A short time later, the City Pages newspaper apparently parodied this action by emblazoning it's distribution boxes with a similar, but en-fanged sprite that bellowed: "Minnesota Not Nice." Still later, a local television station ran an "exposé" that sought to, plagiarliciously, demonstrate the death of common courtesy, entitled: Does Minnesota Nice Still Exist?Now, for those who are unaware, the expression "Minnesota Nice" is used extremely often to describe all manners of behavior in the upper Midwest. Unfortunately, it appears to be completely misunderstood by almost anybody who trumpets it in any manner. Of the three examples above, I think that City Pages got the closest. It seems that people have confused "Minnesota Nice" with similar expressions such as "Southern Hospitality." Now, obviously, I'm not from the south, but from what I understand, the two descriptors are nearly polar opposites. Really, I think that "Minnesota Nice" would be better described as "Minnesota Rage," though, I've been countered on that. "Minnesota Tolerance" was suggested, which I will agree is a suitable substitute. These revamped adjectives replace what really is a "wily misnomer for frigid civility," to be harsh.
So here's the point: Minnesota Nice does not mean that a Minnesotan will go out of his/her way to welcome you into his/her home. You will not get engaged in idle banter by a Minnesotan. You should not expect warm, fuzzy feelings while using the freeways here. That being said, you can expect for everybody to grit and bear it. Minnesotans will wait in line. They will allow you to cut. Then their blood will begin to boil. They will stare. They will give the death look. But they won't do anything about it. Frigid civility. Basically, as much as one might want to, the upper Midwestern fellow will not go out of his way to cause a fuss and would prefer to allow you to be you and him to be him. To be nice to each other. This is what we mean by nice. It follows along the lines of "playing nice."
He's not the guy singing on the bus. He's the guy silently wanting to kill the guy singing on the bus.
It then follows, perhaps, that the same upper Midwestern fellow would prefer to veil any attacks he does plan on making behind sarcasm. While merely a vehicle for comedy in many parts of the country, here, sarcasm is a powerful tool: You can get what you want without actually saying it. Everybody plays nice. If this is the case, then it would seem that Minnesotans are keenly perceptive of sarcasm, and employ it regularly. I can't say for certain if that is correct, but perhaps it is telling that in the last three years, not one person has said to me "Sometimes I just can't tell if you're being serious or not." I felt like this happened at least once a month at ND-- by even my roommates. Well, maybe one person asks (!)
So I find it interesting to see people abuse a state of mind that they don't understand. At the same time I am intrigued by the interesting quirks about this city. Everything from traffic patterns to graffiti to skyway etiquette are unique. Civility is incredibly refreshing and lends itself to the establishment of safe, clean, and effective environments. In fact, this is an outstanding place to live. Sometimes people just don't understand.
A few weeks ago, I was standing in the ridiculously long lunch line at Chipotle, with an Asian who is smaller than me. While minding our business, a tall blonde who clearly thought she was more hot than she actually was budged right in front of us to join her little Target cohorts, without saying a word to us. Just because we're short does not mean you need to walk over us with your cheap stilettos.* From then on, said Asian engaged in a (loud) conversation about how rude it is to budge in front of people and how it makes her blood boil.(I guess you had to be there. This Asian is about 5 feet tall and usually speaks slightly above a whisper tone). Pretty sure the bit heard us through her 80s permed hair. Now that is Minnesota nice.
*Just like when I am playing DARTS at a BAR, you do NOT need to walk in front of me with your popped collar and outdated Doc Martens.
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Anonymous |
10:26 PM