I am fing awesome
I hate my dishwasher.
Since moving in to my palatial abode a mere 10 months ago, my dishwasher-directed rage has done nothing but grow. This dishwasher is painfully slow and very user unfriendly. Occasionally it is whisper quiet, but generally it moans, wails and gnashes its teeth, desperately begging to have its task deemed complete. It frequently leaves me soaking wet and my drinking glasses cracked and/or shattered. I have thought long and hard about it, and I suppose that it has only two positive traits: 1.) It is very thorough and I have never eaten off of cleaner dishes and 2.) It is portable... but this is not nearly as beneficial of a characteristic as you might think. I suppose that the best way to describe it is this: Fully Manual.
So the other day, my dishwasher chose to take out some of its rage on my television viewing habits. I was innocently watching some TV between the agonizing task of scrubbing flatware and cleaning the stoneware, absentmindedly flipping through the channels. Suddenly, without warning, the remote floated to the top of the dishwater. I sheaked like a prepubescent girl and launched it halfway across the room. Sadly, my response time was not quick enough. The battery chamber was completely immersed in grubby water and the interior of the remote was quite soaked.
After a quick stint in the window sill... it did not work.
Tears welled.
It was really sad. Determined, however, I put new batteries into the beast...
...and lo, how it worked! It worked better and cleaner than ever! Woooo!
My remote works, but my dishwasher (ie, hands) still suck.
Booo.
Since moving in to my palatial abode a mere 10 months ago, my dishwasher-directed rage has done nothing but grow. This dishwasher is painfully slow and very user unfriendly. Occasionally it is whisper quiet, but generally it moans, wails and gnashes its teeth, desperately begging to have its task deemed complete. It frequently leaves me soaking wet and my drinking glasses cracked and/or shattered. I have thought long and hard about it, and I suppose that it has only two positive traits: 1.) It is very thorough and I have never eaten off of cleaner dishes and 2.) It is portable... but this is not nearly as beneficial of a characteristic as you might think. I suppose that the best way to describe it is this: Fully Manual.
So the other day, my dishwasher chose to take out some of its rage on my television viewing habits. I was innocently watching some TV between the agonizing task of scrubbing flatware and cleaning the stoneware, absentmindedly flipping through the channels. Suddenly, without warning, the remote floated to the top of the dishwater. I sheaked like a prepubescent girl and launched it halfway across the room. Sadly, my response time was not quick enough. The battery chamber was completely immersed in grubby water and the interior of the remote was quite soaked.
After a quick stint in the window sill... it did not work.
Tears welled.
It was really sad. Determined, however, I put new batteries into the beast...
...and lo, how it worked! It worked better and cleaner than ever! Woooo!
My remote works, but my dishwasher (ie, hands) still suck.
Booo.
I DON'T CARE.
Posted by
Anonymous |
1:42 AM
Then perhaps you should not have forced me to publish it after you tried to out drink every fish in every pond in the city of lakes. Mmm?
Posted by
ndNips |
9:48 AM
Just kidding. I do care. Sort of.
And for the record, we were 6 and 6. Mmmmm?
Posted by
Anonymous |
10:34 AM
So I actually just read your whole entry, and now that I'm not under the influence from all that water, it was kind of funny.
I care.
Posted by
Anonymous |
4:13 PM